My husband left again. This time he will be away for a 7 month deployment. After 11 years of being a military spouse, you would think that I would be used to it by now but I am not. Sometimes the underway periods are easier than others but this time around it is little tougher as the warmer months approach and the children continue to evolve into stubborn pre-teens.
For sanity’s sake, I have learned to refocus my energy during these times. I would spend a lot of time on self-development and enrichment. If I was not doing that, I would focus on the needs of the kids and helping them to not miss their father so much. In the later years of our marriage and as the kids got a little older, I began volunteering for the community and helping out where my energy was most needed. Instead of the negative, I chose to focus on the positive and it has inspired me and has evoked a lot of great ideas. I was reawakening to the fact that I had dreams too!
I want to say it was during my husband’s duty time in China Lake when the first idea of starting my very own business was ignited. I was tired of the constant driving back and forth to work and spending a couple of hours in traffic everyday. I was tired of being the last parent to pick up their children from daycare and eating dinner after 7pm every night. I was tired of feeling guilty to miss work because of a sick child and not having my husband around most of the time to help with taking care of the kids and the house. I was tired of having to rush my kids to bed just to wake them up again at the crack of dawn to start the same routine over again.
I wanted more from life and this routine just was not cutting it for me. I wanted so much to be there for my kids when they got out of school so I can fix them a snack and help them with their homework. I wanted to be able to drop them off in the morning at school when the sun was up instead of paying someone else do it. I wanted to have more control of my life than having someone else clocking what time I came in to work or what time I left. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciated having a job most of the time but my spirit was screaming for something more meaningful instead of sitting in a cubicle all day long listening to grown men curse in the office.
I started volunteering for the community and for causes that I had a soft spot for during the evenings and weekends. Finally, I started to feel better but my spirit was talking to me more and more every day. I realized that If I did not follow what was in my heart, then I was wasting my time and not really living the life I was designed for.
I did the most irresponsible thing ever! I quit my job! Oh my goodness, yes! I really quit my job! I just didn’t have it in me to continue to torture myself by working somewhere I completely hated. This was not the first time I did it but this time I knew it was the last. I turned in my notice and realized then that I had to follow the desire to do my own thing. Looking back, it was probably one of the riskiest things I have ever done before but I can’t say I regret it. I am not promoting it either, I don’t want anyone telling me that they quit their job without a plan because I told them to do it and be blamed for it later. So if you are going to be bold and do something like this, I highly suggest having a good backup plan.
I struggled for a few months until I landed a temporary job and my first real client was referred to me. It helped me through the first 6 months financially. Although it has not been easy, it was liberating. I now am able to take my kids to school and I love being able to cook them a warm breakfast almost every morning. I am usually home when they get home from school and I am always the first one to hear about how their day went, whether it was good or bad. I am more involved in their lives and they are more involved in mine.
They know what Mommy does for a living now and they can help if they want to. If I could do it again, would I? Yes but I would be a little smarter and actually have a real plan of action. Some of those months were pretty scary with no money coming in to help my husband with the bills. I was always worried if the water or electricity would get shut off and prayerful that we would have enough money to put gas in the car but we always came through.
My husband was definitely not thrilled at first. In fact, he groaned and put his face in his hands and asked why? I was upset that he did not have faith in me but I realized he was just surprised and it made me want it more. I spent endless hours really bringing the idea into fruition. I didn’t know how it was going to happen but I have the concept in mind and I had the passion to make it happen. I knew in my gut that this was it and there was no turning back .
Virtual Outsource Concept was born and one year later, I have clients and I have made some awesome connections. I developed an outsource company that is designed to assist small to large businesses from any industry with administrative and creative marketing support. I hire other freelancers to work for me as needed.
I am very optimistic about where the road will lead. So this time around while the hubby is away serving our beloved United States of America, I will be here strengthening the foundation of my business.
My next hope is to be able to help other Military Spouses start their own businesses or offer opportunities for outsourcing work to them as well. I have been there and I believe we need to be making the most of our time while our spouses are serving our country. So if you are someone who would like more information on how to do what I do or if you know someone who does, refer them to me. I would love to help them out!
So remember, even when times are tough while your spouse is away, have FAITH and stay positive. It is important that you direct your energy into creating something meaningful for you and your family!